When Friendship Becomes A Death Sentence: The Unseen War On Transgender Lives

Will friendship with transgender people in our society always cost them their lives?

If the new year begins with bloodshed, how tragic can one imagine its end to be? And that too the murder of a person belonging to a community that already faces discrimination, hatred, and violence in our society solely because of their gender identity.

On January 3, the murder of a transgender person, Basit alias Bijli, in Peshawar once again exposed many bitter realities. This incident reminded me of an event that took place some time ago, which now feels necessary to write about in the context of current circumstances.

One day, I was sitting with my friend at a skincare clinic, waiting for our turn. A transgender woman was sitting beside us. After exchanging greetings, we started talking.

We discussed several topics, but one incident she shared shook me to my core.

She told us that once she was returning home in a rickshaw when the driver repeatedly stared at her through the rear-view mirror.

After a while, he changed the route and turned towards a deserted road. In fear, she started screaming, upon which the driver dropped her off on the way and fled.

However, the most heartbreaking aspect of that moment was that instead of stopping the driver or helping her, the people present there started laughing at her and mocking her with derogatory names.

At that moment, she asked me a question: if the same incident had happened to an ordinary woman, would society's reaction have been the same? This question, in fact, exposes the deep-rooted prejudices and double standards in our society based on gender.

This is not an isolated incident. In many cases, it has been observed that thousands or even lakhs of rupees are showered on transgender people during night gatherings, but once the event ends, the same people snatch the money back at gunpoint. Or the next morning, they knock on the doors of transgender individuals and try to force them into sexual relations or secret friendships.

The bitter truth is that many transgender people are killed simply for refusing friendship, or are sentenced to death for maintaining a relationship with someone else.

The question is: why is it impossible in our society to have a simple, respectful friendship with transgender people? If sitting with them, eating with them, and maintaining social relationships is considered shameful, then why are secret relationships, sexual exploitation, throwing money at them in gatherings, or extorting money from them not considered wrong?

Transgender people are a community that continuously faces discrimination, harassment, and violence in our society. The situation in Khyber Pakhtunkhwa is particularly alarming, where incidents of violence against transgender individuals have significantly increased.

According to statistics, 157 transgender people have been killed in Khyber Pakhtunkhwa over the past ten years. Meanwhile, according to Khyber Pakhtunkhwa police data, 15 cases of transgender murders were registered in the first seven months of 2025 alone, highlighting the severity of the issue.

Organizations associated with the transgender community believe that the actual number may be higher, as many incidents are never reported.

The reasons behind these attacks include societal attitudes, ignorance, and misconceptions about transgender people. In some cases, they are even killed by their own relatives in the name of so-called honor.

To address this situation, mere statements are not enough. Effective legislation for the protection of transgender rights, along with strict and practical implementation, is essential.

Every incident of violence must be investigated promptly, transparently, and fairly so that perpetrators are punished and such crimes can be prevented in the future.

At the same time, providing psychological and social support to transgender people, and launching educational and awareness programs to change negative societal attitudes towards them, is an urgent need of the time.

Because until transgender people are accepted as complete human beings, humanity itself will remain a question mark in our society.

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